1. Don’t try to piss quietly. Nobody in a public restroom thinks you’re knitting in your stall. They came to piss, just like you. And if you have to take a dump, do it. Get over your fear of public toilets. It’ll make life a lot easier.
2. Masturbate. Masturbate a lot. Talk about it with your friends. You’ve got the right to make yourself feel good and brag about it just like all the boys with extra large kleenex packages on their desks.
3. If you want the large fries, get the large fries. Hunger and appetite are nothing to be ashamed of, just human. Don’t ever feel guilty for eating in front of others. You need to nourish your body to stay alive. We all do.
4. Laugh as loud as you have to, no matter if you snort or gasp or literally scream.
5. Fart when you have to.
6. Always remember you weren’t born to visually please others. Forget the phrase “what if they think it’s ugly”. If you think it’s lovely, it is lovely. You wanna wear it, wear it!
7. Speak your mind! You can learn to do so without insulting others or shoving your opinion down other people’s throats.
Not rushing anymore
Here lately I feel as though I have been a total slacker in life. I have been at the same job for almost 3 years now, and still live at home. I feel as though I should be making huge leaps in life and should rush to the top of the ladder of success. I should be out in the world, meeting new people, dating, getting married, and having kids and living the American dream.
But here’s the thing, small things happen instantly where as big things take time. What does that mean? I heard this concept while driving home one day on the Christian radio station and to be quite honest I didn’t put much thought into it at first. I admittedly accepted the concept at face value and did not see how it applied in my life.
You see, it all started about a year and a half ago when I decided to call off my engagement. I was engaged to the guy I had been dating for over 5 years. It only made sense that we were to get married, have kids, and live happily ever after. Unfortunately, happily ever after didn’t happen with this princess. Instead I was heart broken, embarrassed and alone. I was alone. This had never happened in my life before. I simply thought that I would easily move on and find that special someone again. Boy was I wrong!
I was conditioned to think and believe that big things happen right away in my life because honestly that is how it has always happened. I was so used to getting things done as fast and efficiently as possible that I never took the time to just let things happen on their own time. I always had to rush things into motion to say that I was accomplishing something.
This is where my downfall has come. I have demanded to be in control of everything in my life to ensure its success. I was a control freak. Sitting in my car that day listening to that youth pastor made me think about my life and how I’m always rushing into things. God doesn’t rush into accomplishing big things so why am I?
This is where I have decided to stop rushing into everything I do and to allow for God to accomplish His work in my life in His time. Crazy right? The control freak is giving up control? How is that even possible? I honestly don’t know how this is possible but I’m doing it. I am going to place my faith in God and give him complete control of my life. I have decided to stop rushing my life along and to instead enjoy each day with those that I love dearly.
I have learned that I have the best family a girl could ask for, even though we get on each other’s nerves all the time. I have the greatest friends who are willing to listen to my venting sessions and comfort me when needed. I work at the most amazing private practice where I get to see on a daily basis how much of an impact I have on my patient’s lives. I have my dream car. Just when I thought that I have been a slacker I realized that I am not. God is continuously working on my big thing. By giving Him control I don’t have to worry about what that big thing is; instead,@ I am allowed to enjoy each day as it comes.
I refuse to rush anymore and instead focus on giving graciously of what is mine, providing love that is ever steadfast, understand and appreciate those around me, and to have faith not only in myself but in God. Small things happen instantly, but big things take time. I will gladly wait for my big thing to come in life.@